My friendship with Ashley

Relationships in our lives are rarely static; they’re always either growing or fading. Knapp's Relational Model explains this really well, and I can see it mirrored in my relationship with my coworker, Ashley. The stage that fits us best at the moment is the intensifying stage, when things start to feel more personal, and the connection gets stronger. We have moved past being only coworkers and are now friends.

When I first met Ashley at work, we mostly only talked about work-related stuff and superficial personal details. It consisted of us doing our jobs and maybe a little small talk here and there. But after a while, we started talking more during our shifts and realized we actually had a lot in common. That’s when things started to shift. Our conversations became more natural, and we started opening up about things going on in our lives outside of work. We then started hanging out outside of work, and we felt more like friends who worked together than just coworkers.

A big part of that came from connecting on Snapchat. Once we started messaging outside of work, we talked way more often. It made it easier to keep conversations going and to share random things throughout the day, especially if they were related to veterinary medicine (our field). According to Pearson et al. (2021), self-disclosure is important in building relationships, and I definitely saw that happen with us. The more we talked, the more comfortable we got with each other.

At the same time, texting isn’t always perfect. There were moments where messages got misunderstood, especially since you can’t hear tone or see facial expressions. Sometimes a short reply would seem off, even if it wasn’t meant that way. Ashley has a very dry sense of humor, so sometimes I can’t tell if she’s irritated bout something or just kidding, but it doesn't strain our relationship. It’s just how she expresses herself. Pearson et al. (2021) talk about how perception plays a big role in communication, and that’s definitely true when you’re relying on messages.

I think the intensifying stage of my friendship with Ashley really shows how communication, online and through text, can bring people closer. It helped us build a stronger connection, even if it came with a few misunderstandings along the way.

Reference

Pearson, J. C., Nelson, P. E., Titsworth, S., & Hosek, A. M. (Eds.). (2021). Human communication (7th ed.). McGraw-Hill Education.